Well that got your attention didn't it?! :P
Just like everything else that sounds too good to be true, it probably is!
So why try to grab your attention in such a deceitful way? Well it worked didn't it? ;) Hahaha
Now here is the real reason I did it...
There are some significant realities, choices and changes that I am currently dealing with and working through. I absolutely plan on sharing these things with you all when the time comes and when I feel ready to do so.
These issues have led me to do some pretty heavy reflecting. Where I was, how far I've come and where I'm going from here.
A huge part of my reason to blog has always been, that in some way, I might help someone else.
It was while I was watching the season premier of Biggest Loser, that the inspiration for this blog came to me!
At almost 250lbs, I was convinced that the first week or two I started on my program with Coach Compton, I would be dropping upwards of 10lbs a week. After all, isn't that what happens with the morbidly obese people on the show? I'm morbidly obese (or was), so I should fit into that category! Furthermore, every week after that I should be dropping a good 5+lbs consistently cause I'm just as big as those people!
REALITY CHECK!!!
Imagine my absolute horror, honestly I thought I was a failure and worthless, when my first week weigh in resulted in a 2lb weight loss. Crap! I suck cause I'm fat and I can't even lose weight right!
You want the reality of what was in my head at that time? Well there it is, and it's not pretty!
Many know me as the one that is always smiling, dancing and being positive. What many don't see is that I can bruise myself from head to toe with a verbal beating like no other.
Why am I so upbeat and nice to others? Because they deserve the the gift I was not able to give myself.
I spent a very long time being not very nice to myself, something I have been working on for the last two and a half years.
So why relive all this? Well selfishly, it's pretty therapeutic! lol And like I said before, I want to help.
With the new year beginning and resolutions being made to become healthy and lose weight, I want people to know the truth about weight loss.
It is hard effing work!!!
Please do NOT hold yourself to some bizarre weight loss standard just because you see it on tv. You have NO idea what goes on behind the scenes.
Don't get me wrong, I love watching weight loss shows. The determination and drive, frustration and hopefully success that these people go through inspires me to keep on my path and I applaud them!
That being said, it is not sunshine and roses every week when you step on the scale. It is an emotional roller coaster. But just because you didn't hit an unrealistic goal that you saw on tv, or came up with in your own head, does not mean that you are or will for forever be an overweight failure!
Did you hear me??? YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!!!
What did Sam (Coach Compton) say the first time I stepped on the scale? You lost 2lbs! Thats great!
Were there some weeks that I lost 4lbs? Yes, two weeks in a row actually. There were also some weeks I didn't lose an ounce!
But when I finally hit my 100lb mark and Sam did the calculations, it was an average of 2lbs/ week.
Not glamourous or fast. It was nose to the grindstone, living a whole new way, moving forward little by little.
Kind of like erosion! Hahaha
Just because my main focus of losing weight has now shifted (more to come on that later ;) doesn't mean that the lessons I've learned no longer apply OR they might help enlighten others.
Take from this what you will or file it under BS. lol
I just know that the day I realized (with the help of those around me that truly cared and knew what they were talking about) that your journey is YOURS and not a cookie cutter of someone else's success or "failures", was the day I was able to really commit fully to the fact that I wasn't going to stop progressing.
Each step forward or backward or to the side was still movement and movement is always better than being stagnant!
Well thats it for my rant! hahahaa I hope it helps in whatever way its meant to, I know it has helped me just in writing it ;)
Til next time...
Forward facing hugs...
-Crystal :) xo
No comments:
Post a Comment