Road to recovery

Hi Everyone!

So today marks two weeks since my surgery, time really does fly!

In the last two weeks I have been out of the house four times, twice for doctors appointments, once for a much needed breakfast date with Coach and for my daughters KungFu grading (which I was NOT missing!!!).

I have watched more TV than I have probably in the last year and have possibly become addicted to "Duck Dynasty" "Mad Men" and "Homeland". 

For those who know me, being shut in the house is a challenge as I am usually on the go. Thank goodness for all my amazing friends/family that have been visiting with coffee and news of the outside world! Hahaha

This forced down time is really teaching me the importance of time and healing. Not just physically but emotionally.

While I feel really good physically, better than I thought I would at this point, I am having to constantly remind myself that I still need to take it easy and rest.

Not being able to do household things like reaching into the washing machine or stretch to put dishes away is frustrating. Letting go of all the responsibility is even more so.

Mentally, this struggle is harder.

Being dedicated to losing weight and creating and maintaining a healthy lifestyle has been my main focus for almost 3 years now. Always planning, organizing and keeping active.

Now needing to rest and letting go, temporarily, of the desire to push myself. The fear of how my body is going to react to the lack of exercise and adding to all this the guilt that I feel for allowing myself to get so far out of whack in the first place. As you might guess, there has been much reflection happening.

At the end of the day, I’m not completely daft lol I know that rest is the best thing for me. Pushing myself too much is just not worth risking all the amazing work that the good doctors, coaches and I have done up to this point.

As for everything else, well what’s done is done!

I did become morbidly obese… I chose to do something about it and surrounded myself with genuine people that helped me become healthy… I worked my ass off… gave no excuses, just did what I needed to… paid the price physically, mentally and even monetarily to get where I am now.

I guess that earns me the right to forgive myself.

I’m sure that I will have many more ups and down in the healing process but right now I’m feeling pretty peaceful.

Til next time, 

I'll end with this "funny" cause I just couldn't resist :P... 

Happy Happy Happy Hugs...

-Crystal :) xo